Intermarriage Row Must Be Resolved Soon
by Joeanna Rebello Fernandes via Times of India, 8th May 2011
“It’s not so much the elephant in the room that no one wants to acknowledge, but rather the unicorn they all imagine-that the global Parsi population isn’t so desperately in decline, but that it has somehow miraculously ballooned to four million.”
“Rubbish, was the emphatic denial of Dinyar Patel, a California-born, PhD candidate in history at Harvard University, who held his largely Parsi audience at Nehru Centre in thrall last evening, when he catalogued for them empirical evidence of their decline, and warned them of their fall.”
Dinyar produced Parsi scholarship and demographic surveys to revisit the crisis of the falling numbers of Indian Parsis, while positing more tenable theories for their attenuation than widely-circulated myths about migration and marriage outside the community”
Read the entire story by clicking here.
Parsis also need to know that, like other Indians marrying later, many also have biological fertility problems. It’s not a problem specific to Parsis, as India now has many fertility clinics.
Parsis can actually help. Like other Indians, some Parsis, for whom ivf and other fertility solutions have failed, need egg or sperm donations. But most Indian fertility clinics do not have donors from specific groups, such as Parsi (or Sikh, Goan, or Jewish).
If Parsis wish to aid their fellow Parsis, and play a direct role in helping a small part of the population problem, they can easily volunteer to be put on egg or sperm donor lists at any fertility clinic, after blood and other tests are confirmed passable. Sperm donation can be done anytime and frozen; egg donation is time-specific and slightly complex (involves taking mild drugs to stimulate egg production) but painless. It costs nothing to volunteer to be an egg or sperm donor. And you wouldnt be saving a life, you’d be helping MAKE a life. For our small community, that is a priceless “good deed”.
Your idea is very interesting and worth some thought and discussion. The floor is open here, and will see where else we can share the idea and get feedback.
Inspirational, thanks! We often wonder how we can help stabilise our population. This article and comment have made us think, perhaps we can.
We have several friends struggling with fertility, and India’s increasing numbers of fertility clinics are offering them hope that would have been near-impossible just a decade ago. Two couples eventually became pregnant via ivf. One couple, after many ivf failures, eventually adopted a child. And several more are considering egg or sperm donation. Among our friends have been several Parsis (both those married to other Parsis, and inter-married). They are all having trouble finding fertility clinics with donors of their specific ethnic background. They are not seeking ethnic-specific donors because of prejudice, but just to feel a genetic connection. We recently heard of a North American Parsi couple seeking an egg donor:
Their struggles are brave, and show us how lucky we are to have two children. My spouse and I have been discussing how we might help. Possibly by volunteering to donate sperm or eggs for childless Parsi couples.
We know we have to be comfortable with the idea that our genetic material would be with another family. But we feel that since we all may be related anyway, we’re comfortable with that. We don’t know of any Delhi clinic with existing Parsi donors. But we heard that one Mumbai fertility clinic currently has Parsi egg donors on their lists: Bloom IVF Centre at Lilavati Hospital: http://www.bloomivf.com/
We’re currently considering volunteering to be donors! We beleive we will feel like we’re doing our part to help the community. But just to know we’re helping another couple who are going through immense stress and sadness, would be enough thanks. We encourage other Parsis to explore this too. It really would be a “good deed”.
we are here to help you as many people are having infertility problems these days. we have currently parsi egg donors and we could help you is solving your isssues with our experience. Swcic, Best IVF center, visit: http://www.swcic.com/index.php
We are a couple not in Delhi, but in the Diaspora. Having heard of the egg-donor seeking couple in the US, we came to this site after an internet search. We ourselves have had fertility problems, and said so when answering Harvard phd candidate Dinyar Patel’s survey on Zoroastrians and marriage (see below for links).
We know of many couples of many backgrounds with fertility problems, but are glad to know we’re not the only Zoroastrians facing these issues!
We’re currently undergoing fertility treatment, but like the couple in the US, we may end up having to seek a donor. Thank you Tika for mentioning the Bloom IVF Clinic at Lilavati Hospital in Mumbai. Egg donation can be very expensive, and finding a donor of one’s own ethnic background is difficult. So going to India may end up being the best option.
We wish there was some kind of internet forum to share and discuss these issues. Maybe we’ll create one. But for now, we’re glad some discussion is going on this site.
(click on “full listing of responses”)
Our advice, for those in Delhi and beyond: Don’t assume that couples without children dont want them. Express your support for ivf and other options when amongst friends. And above all: DO CONSIDER VOLUNTEERING TO BE A POTENTIAL EGG OR SPERM DONOR. It’s a tangible way you can help your community.
Good to read this – so where are we on the next steps and further developments. I am an aspirant parent looking for a donor. My 11 yr son was killed in the previous month in a road accident – our lives are in total darkness and without any purpose. We are in our forties and the only ray of hope can come through a donor.
Our condolences and prayers for you and your family. If there is anything we can do for you as Parsis, do write to me (email@example.com) and I will forward your email to the relevant people or Anjuman Trustees.
Meanwhile we will let you know in case we hear of any way we can help you on the donor issue. And of course, hope someone reads this exchange here and can help.
Prayers and Regards
we can help you inn any kind of donors and we can provide parsis donor for you. please do visit our hospital and our leading consultants will guide you in the treatment process. Swcic, visit us: http://www.swcic.com/index.php
Thanks for sharing this useful information